“Peace is within oneself to be found in the same place as agitation and suffering. It is not found in a forest or on a hilltop, nor is it given by a teacher. Where you experience suffering, you can also find freedom from suffering. Trying to run away from suffering is actually to run toward it.”—Ajahn Chah (via thecalminside)
i’m tired of my society judging me. judging everyone. the little thoughts that people have in their head when they look at me, at other people — stop fucking doing that society this is me get over it.
i’m just so fucking done with looking at myself in the mirror and trying to apply myself in situations that never follow through with what i want to happen. 2 different things, mind you.
i’m just fucking done with everything at this point. i don’t even have any beef with people or anything— i just am done.
i don’t want to deal with stress, anxiety, or depression. i don’t want to. i don’t want to deal with anything or anyone. not at this point in my life.
i want to get away. i really want to run away and never come back. alone. i wish i lived my life already and reach that point in my life where i could die peacefully with no regrets. i want to already reminisce about all the good things in life and prepare for my death.
i’m done with trying. i’m at a crossroads in my life right now at this very moment. college is around the corner and honestly is it worth it?
i’m just so frustrated with myself — panicking over nothing, overanalyzing everything, everyone… why do i even do that. it makes things worse for me.
i don’t even know anymore. I JUST DON’T WANT TO DEAL WITH ANYTHING RIGHT NOW. that is all
SOCIAL MEDIA: don’t use it as reason to rub your happiness in other people’s faces. lesson for me: focus on yourself, not on other people’s happiness. prioritize what YOU want.
i want to surround myself with the right environment. i want to be in college already, and keep the friendships worth keeping while making new friends in college. i’m tired of seeing the same faces but yet i’m scared to meet new one’s.
i’ve already accepted my past. now i want to take it to my future endeavors and make mistakes so i can learn from them and find myself. i know i have a purpose for being on this earth… not sure what it is quite yet, but i’m ready to work myself up towards my own goal of finding something i have much passion for and making a living out of it.
and that right there is a journey worth documenting. something worth people should know about. something that’s worth sharing. something that is a conversation starter. we are degrading the value of important things in our lives by exploiting it with social media. idk.
i’m working towards my own adventure. i hate where i am right now. i want to go to college and be the independent being that i am and meet new faces. guess that’s all a part of the adventure — the thrill of life — and i’m ready for it. #unedited
you now what fucking sux. YOU KNOW WHAT FUCKING SUX?? WHEN YOURE DROOLING ALL OVER THE PLACE AND YOUR GAUZE PADS ARE GETTING SOAKED WITH JUST DISGUSTINGNESS and on top of it it like hurts. bloody hell i’m a mess